How to Write a Wedding Speech (Even If You Hate Writing)
The blank page. The deadline creeping closer. The 2am panic. You know what you feel but not how to say it. This guide fixes that.
Write My SpeechThe 5 steps to a great wedding speech
Every great wedding speech follows the same process. Here is the full sequence, in order.
Pick your one thing
A wedding speech is not a biography. It is not a list of qualities. Find the one emotional truth you want to leave the room with and let everything else serve it. One thread, pulled through the whole thing.
Find your stories
General praise ("he is the most loyal person I know") disappears the moment it is spoken. A specific story anchors it. Think back to the moment that best illustrates the quality you want to highlight. One real moment, told with enough detail that people who were not there can picture it, is worth more than ten paragraphs of adjectives.
Get the structure right
Most speeches that work share the same arc: a hook that earns attention in the first 30 seconds, a middle that develops your one emotional thread through story, and a close that arrives at a toast that feels earned rather than tacked on. The structure is not the speech. It just gives the speech somewhere to go.
Write like you talk
This is the single most important instruction in this entire guide. Read your draft out loud. If you would never say it that way in a conversation, rewrite it until you would. Contractions, informal phrasing, the sentence that trails off: all of this is welcome. Sentences that sound like a school essay are not.
Time it
Read your speech aloud, at the pace you will actually deliver it, with a timer running. Three to four minutes is the target for most speeches. If you are over five, cut. You are not cutting content, you are making the content you keep stronger. The hardest edit is always the right one.
“Write like you talk.
Not like you write.”
The most common wedding speech mistakes
Going too long
No one has ever left a wedding wishing the speeches had gone longer. The instinct to add more is almost always wrong. Plan for three and a half minutes and stick to it.
Reading without looking up
A speech read at the paper is a different experience than one delivered to the room. Practice enough that you can look up for entire sentences. Eye contact with the couple during the emotional moments is what people remember.
Ending without a toast
The speech needs to land, not fade. Your final line should be a clear invitation for the room to raise their glasses. One sentence, said directly to the couple, that closes the door on everything you just said. Then stop.
What if writing is not your thing?
Most of the people who give the best wedding speeches are not writers. They are people who know the couple well and are willing to be honest about what they know. The stories are already there. The problem is usually finding them and then trusting them enough to put them on a page.
SpokenVow interviews you first. Not a form. An actual interview with questions designed by professional speechwriters to find the specific moments and details that make a speech worth giving. Then it writes your speech from your answers, in your voice, with three different style angles to choose from.
You do not have to be a writer. You just have to know the person.
Explore the wedding speech writing guides
- How to End a Wedding Speech
The last line is the one they carry home. Here is how to stick the landing.
- How to Shorten a Wedding Speech
What to cut when your draft is too long, and why cutting is always right.
- How to Memorize a Wedding Speech
You do not need to memorize it word for word. You need to know it well enough to look up.
- How to Practice a Wedding Speech
The rehearsal routine that separates nervous readers from confident speakers.
- How Not to Cry During a Wedding Speech
Practical techniques for getting through the emotional parts without stopping.
- The Three-Minute Wedding Speech
Why three minutes is the sweet spot, and how to build a speech that fits.
- The Best Wedding Speech Opening Lines
Examples of strong first lines across every speech type.
- Wedding Speech Red Flags
Signs that your draft needs work, and how to fix each one.
- Nervous About Your Wedding Speech?
What to do with the nerves in the days and hours before you take the mic.
Skip the blank page. Let SpokenVow interview you.
Answer 10 minutes of questions. Get three speech drafts in your voice. Pick the one that sounds most like you, refine it, and deliver it with confidence.
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